Ancient Perversion


The Lady Alana suggested to Ranma that he should begin training others.
Beorn definitely wanted to learn, and those guards he had traveled with
had begged him to train them. Ranma informed her that as the heir to the
Musabetso Kakuto Ryuu, it was inappropriate for him to teach another
school first, and he could not teach his school until the living founder
gave him a license to teach.

So the Lady Alana searched his world, and found a cave on a 
mountainside, covered with wards, wherein there lay bound and sleeping
an ancient perversion. She guided Ranma through the casting of a complex
spell that wove quietly between the wards, and drew out the sleeping
master. 

Master Happosai awoke suddenly, and found himself in the middle of a
chalk circle. He noticed the young boy first, and immediately dismissed
him. Then he noticed the beautiful lady standing behind him. "Hotcha!
Hot Mama!" He cried, leaping to glomp her, only to bounce off the air
between them, above the chalk circle. The boy just grinned at him, and
waggled his fingers in the air. Happosai felt a sudden surge of pain
whip through him, causing his heart to skip a beat. 

"We will have none of that, Master." The young boy's voice was at odds
with his grinning countenance. His face was light, but his words were
calm, hard, and cold. "You are offered a choice. You may have three
months of freedom, in which to train me and license me to teach the
Musabetso Kakuto Ryuu, and then return to the dank hole from which we
summoned you, or you can return there right now."

Happosai collapsed in laughter, only to receive another whip of pain.
Sullenly, he straightened, and stared at the boy. "The Musabetso Kakuto
Ryuu is the study of a lifetime, boy. How can you expect to master it in
three months?"

"I have been trained in it since I was five. I was awarded my
eleventh dan in Tai Chi Chuan after my third month of study in it,
having never used it before. You have three months. There are additional
conditions."

"Oh? Huh. There is no eleventh dan in Tai Chi Chuan. What conditions?"

"There is now. I took it beyond the skills of the masters who taught me.
The conditions are, you will touch no woman while you are here." The
Master spluttered in protest, but was ignored. "You will be provided
with recently worn feminine undergarments," and here the boy's face was
twisted in a look of disgust, "as required to maintain your strength. No
more questions, Master. You have your choice. Make it."

"Alright, alright. You're insane if you think you can learn it that
fast, but three months is three months. I'll teach you. But I won't
license you boy, unless you can beat me!"

The boy waved his hand. "Follow me. I will show you the dojo, and we
will begin."

"Hey, damnit! I'm the Sensei here, kid!"

---

Arkus found the situation infuriating. The boy finally got away from
that damned dragon, after far longer than he had expected, and now he
was closeted with a pervert. Master Happosai's mind was far too dirty
and perverted for Arkus to stand touching. Indeed, he bathed for five
hours straight after first reaching out to the man's warped mind. He
stayed far away after that.

It was well into the second month of the training when Krall learned
that the boy had managed to return to the castle without any of the
numerous warriors lining the border of Farallon detecting his passage,
nor any in Farallon itself being aware of it. He was infuriated by the
failure of Friss's plan, but avoided a precipitous reaction when even as
he prepared a vengeful strike against the boy, Friss returned with news
of the defeat of Lord Ereth at the boy's hands. 

The possibilities immediately sang to him, for Ereth was the 
acknowledged Master at binding men to his will. His were the best
assassins, for they would stop at nothing, and feel no pain. Nothing
less than utter destruction would prevent them from achieving their
goal. Doubtless Ereth would seek to eliminate the Lord Fey, and if Krall
simply waited, he could have the kingdom with no blood on his hands. 

Ever since the peace with Farallon had come about, Krall had wondered
how to get around their Mage Tower, for he had little doubt that they
would seek to use their black arts to divine the perpetrator of the
deadly event. If he could achieve his goals while remaining honestly and
legitimately uninvolved, so much the better.

---

The Master was pleasantly surprised as the weeks, and then months
passed, and Ranma quickly absorbed everything the Master had to teach.
Happosai still had no expectation or intention of licensing the little
snot, but on the morning of their final bout to determine the fate of
his license, Happosai did make a concession. "Fey, my boy, I hate to
admit this, but you make me wish I hadn't promised Genma to let his son
Ranma be my heir. You would have made a great heir. I'll tell you what.
After I beat your ass here and get away, I'll find the boy, and train
him for just three months. It ought to be fair, after all, he'll have
been trained by his father all this time. Then, I'll let you two fight
to see who becomes my heir."

"Entirely unnecessary, Sensei. Ranma is your heir. I would not stand in
his way." Ranma was grinning inside. Boy, wouldn't Happosai be fuming
when he learned the truth. Ranma had found it was great fun to tease the
old man.

Happosai was incensed that the boy refused his offer. "Enough chatter,
boy. Hiyah!" Happosai sprang to the attack with a sweeping kick, a feint
that succeeded, letting him get close enough to use his pipe. He
performed his signature move, using the pipe, charged with ki,  to
redirect the boy's momentum, expecting to send the boy flying high into
the air. 

Best to end this quickly, and get away before they sent him back to that
damned cave, he thought. His shock was complete, when the pipe trick
ended with him embedding himself into the soft earth, completely gone
from sight. He began to scrabble frantically, desperate for air, when he
felt a gentle strength cradle him, and lift him back to the surface.

"Haven't you ever been told never to try to move a Tai Chi Master,
Sensei?" The boy's infernal grin mocked him. Happosai groused to
himself. He'd thought the boy was pulling his leg about the Tai Chi,
after all, everyone knew there were only ten dans. But obviously it had
been a feint within a feint, and the boy really was a master of Tai Chi.
Happosai had to admire the boy's quick wit. 

Happosai sprang back to the attack, then bounced backwards, and leapt
into the air. "Happou Dai Karin!" he shouted, throwing several bombs at
Fey. A light breeze blew past, and their fuses went out. "Huh?"
Happosai sputtered. "That's not supposed to happen." 

He pulled out another, bigger bomb, with a lit fuse. He threw it at
Fey, and it stopped an inch from his hand, hanging there in front of
him. He had only time to whimper, before it went off, throwing him
backwards. He was picked up and brushed off by Fey. "Come on, Master.
Don't give up so easy."

"Who's giving up," snarled Happosai, and leaped back to the attack.
While he often used his special attacks to win without risk to himself,
he was a genuinely skilled martial artist. But he had never faced an
opponent like Fey before. No matter how fast he punched, or kicked, or
blocked, he couldn't touch Fey, and Fey seemed to tap him at will. 

Fey did not do as he had done with Lord Ereth, however. He knew better
than to solely use the Tai Chi Chuan against Happosai. He used the
Musabetso Kakuto Ryuu, using Tai Chi only to redirect Happosai's
attacks, and to leap again before touching the ground, and rebound in
mid-air. The rebounds were the worst for Happosai, as he simply couldn't
seem to anticipate them, for there really was no warning, and no way of
telling at what point in a leap Fey would suddenly redirect his motion
in absurd defiance of gravity and inertia. 

Fey wasn't punching hard, just letting Happosai know that his defenses
were open. This just infuriated Happosai, and like so many before him, he
exhausted himself, running on the fumes of his anger, striving to
connect with Ranma, and failing, while Ranma whipped about him, seeming 
to penetrate his defenses at will. 

Ranma, for his part, was absolutely delighted at the speed and reflexes
he gained by using the Neko-ken. When he had first learned to invoke it,
the only real advantage he had gained was the ki claws. After living in
it for a month, it had matured, and he was now gaining all the
advantages he once gained in his insanity, and more. His speed was far
greater, and his senses and reflexes were both more finely tuned. He
wondered what the old Master would say if he realized how he was being
beaten. 

Finally, after going all out for nearly five hours, exhausting his
impressive chi reserves, Happosai collapsed to the ground, worn out.
"Alright, damn you. You're unnatural, you know that? But I'll give you
your damned license."

Ranma grinned at that, but internally, felt very grateful that the old
master had finally been worn down. Ranma had been forced to almost
completely release his Juushin Jisei Juuryoku, the gravity field he was
using to train, to keep up the ki needed for the Neko-ken.

True to his word, Happosai gave Ranma a license to teach, and gave
him a grandmaster's belt. Still, he warned Ranma, "Fey, my boy, you have
a license to teach the Happosai Musabetso Kakuto Ryuu, or the Saotome.
But if you teach some weird mix, with that Tai Chi, and the way you
fight, don't you go calling it the Happosai, or the Saotome school. Call
it what it is. The Fey school of Anything Goes, and be proud to teach
it. Now send me home, and let me rest."

So was founded the Fey Dojo, wherein was taught the Fey Musabetso Kakuto
Ryuu. It was not long before Ranma's classes were swelled with men, both
from his own troops of soldiers, and the neighboring five kingdoms, and
a number of wandering warriors. He focused on those who showed the most
promise, and set them to teaching the others, so that he could return to
his own training. Though he had mastered the Musabetso, he still could
not begin to free his Lady.